


My Heart Will Go On and On

by runningfromrealitytoanime



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Titanic Fusion, Crossdressing, F/M, Falling In Love, Love on a ship, M/M, Sakusa dressing up as a girl, Song: My Heart Will Go On (Céline Dion), sakusa in a skirt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-25
Updated: 2020-11-25
Packaged: 2021-03-09 23:02:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,054
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27703861
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/runningfromrealitytoanime/pseuds/runningfromrealitytoanime
Summary: When Miya Atsumu boards the Shiratorizawa, he never expects to fall in love with Sakusa Kiyoomi, currently under disguise as his older sister onboard the ship.Titanic au!
Relationships: Miya Atsumu/Sakusa Kiyoomi, Sakusa Kiyoomi/Ushijima Wakatoshi
Comments: 2
Kudos: 29





	My Heart Will Go On and On

**Author's Note:**

> Started having this idea before bed and thought, heck, even though I have seven hours of class ahead of me, fanfic rules! Just started writing this down and managed to get this far so quite happy with it. 
> 
> Just a note that Sakusa is dressed as a girl here because he has to stand in for his sister in an engagement meeting (also why would I pass a chance to write about him in a freaking skirt?!)
> 
> I had inititally wanted to do a multichapter but considering how I cannot stand writing each bit in detail I thought I just do somewhat of a summary of what happens. Hope you guys like it!
> 
> Enjoy!

Miya Atsumu grins as he barely manages to get onto the boarding ramp, throwing his suitcase on board before scrambling onto the ramp. The poor porter was gawking at the passenger as the man gave a loud whoop, moving to turn and grin at the now fading docks of Tokyo as he shouts, “Hell yeah! I made it onto the Shiratorizawa!” As he shouts, the sound of the engines blowing into the wind filled the air, Atsumu laughing as he finally hauls himself on board and takes his things from the porter. He lugs it all the way down to the third-class deck where he will be staying for the next three months, on board a luxurious cruise ship sailing from Tokyo to New York.

To hell if he had a passport or not, he was going to have a time of his life and tell Osamu all about it when he got back! It wasn’t all the time he played a game of poker and managed to win the game and a ticket to the world famous Shiratorizawa.

After unpacking, Atsumu found himself standing on the top deck, letting the wind hit his face. The salty water did nothing to tamper his happiness as he hummed a low tune under his breath, the sun kissing his tanned skin as he took in the sunlight. He didn’t pay heed of the rich passengers whispering after him, wondering what a low-class passenger such as himself was even doing amongst them. It wasn’t as though the lower-class were not allowed to be on the upper decks; they just assumed that they only stayed below and not mingle with the rich unless they wanted to have their asses handed back to them with insults.

“La la la, la la la la. La la la, la la.” Atsumu hums as he pushes himself off the railing before making his way to the front of the ship. He tipped his hat as some passengers passed by, using his best grin to make some women blush and even some of the men to begin questioning themselves. If Atsumu had been born rich, he would have no problem swooping in any man or woman he had ever wanted into his arms. Too bad the only people who went after him were only after his looks; most left after they found out about his shitty personality.

Atsumu continued his trek down the deck when he turned to see some people basking about, some of them sipping tea in the shade of canopies. Some couples were laughing as they talked, holding their hands as some even tried to sneak kisses under the cover. Atsumu grimaced as he walked past them, moving to the front of the ship before climbing the steps to the forecastle deck. His feet echoed across the metal staircase as he climbed higher and higher, his heart pounding as the sun hit his face. He was about to sigh and take in the sunlight when he saw a single figure standing in the light, a parasol in hand as they basked in the sunlight. When they turned, Atsumu’s heart almost stopped as black eyes and a scowl met his, framed by curly hair and twin moles kissing the top of their eyebrows.

It was at that moment that Miya Atsumu, third class passenger fell in love with the child of Lord Sakusa, Sakusa Kiyoomi, bethrothed to the Captain of the ship, Ushijima Wakatoshi.

…

Sakusa Kiyoomi never asked to be put in such a compromising situation.

After his sister had eloped with her lover to god knows where, the Sakusa family had been forced to play their hand in their little game of marriage. After making headlines of their daughter’s engagement to the captain of the Shiratorizawa, Ushijima Wakatoshi, they were forced to make a decision lest lose their dignity in the upper class circle. The Ushijima family were a well-known family of seamen, with Ushijima being the top of his class in the Navy.

Which was how Kiyoomi ended up being forced to dress up as a girl, corset and all and sitting in front of his former childhood friend and crush, fidgeting on the edge of his skirt. He had no idea how the hell people hadn’t noticed him being a boy by far; he had a much bigger build and his sister. Yes, when they were younger and used to play dress up, at times he managed to pass off as a girl or was even said to look very similar to his sister. His parents had begged him to just stand in for his sister, just a few hours a day just to keep up appearances and make the Ushijima family happy, which led to him having tea with Wakatoshi in one of the fine restaurants aboard the ship.

He had never felt so nerve wrecked his entire life as Wakatoshi slowly set his tea cup down. The captain hadn’t lost his stern face since they were young; often Kiyoomi wondered what made him fall for the man in the first place.

“Kiyoomi, you don’t have to force yourself to do this,” Wakatoshi murmurs as Kiyoomi chuckles dryly, “What choice do I have? Unless I remain like this, Father and Mother are going to lose their place in the upper classes.”

“You shouldn’t let them bound you to the family. You are more than they think you are, Kiyoomi.” Wakatoshi reaches to give his gloved hand a squeeze, sending chills up Kiyoomi’s spine as he breathed. Wakatoshi was kind in making sure he didn’t have to go out too often, often keeping to his chambers where he could at least be at peace in his own body.

“Thank you for joining me for tea today, Lady Kiyoko. Now, if you will excuse me, I must head back to my duties.” Ushijima stands up, moving to help Kiyoomi from his seat. He tried his best not to blush as the captain led him out of the restaurant, arm in arm as many women swooned in jealousy.

At least one of the perks of being dressed as a woman was that he could be with any man he wanted without feeling shy about it. His parents were not too keen about his inclination towards men but they hadn’t said anything about it outright denying it as long as he married a girl of their choosing in the future.

He and Wakatoshi parted ways as Wakatoshi headed back up to the main deck, leaving Kiyoomi to wander around on his own. He slowly opened up his parasol, trying to shield himself from the sun as much as he could. The face mask he wore did nothing in trying to stop people from staring at his direction, the boy trying to hide in the shadows. He hated being in tight spaces and the thought of having to be onboard a ship with so many people for a long period of time made him sick.

Somehow, he found himself standing on top of the forecastle, staring out at the sea before him. He let out a sigh as he slowly tugged his mask down, letting the salty air hit his nose. It felt so much cleaner and relieving now that he was away from the crowd, Kiyoomi wishing he had brought a deck chair and a book to just bask in the sunlight when he heard footsteps coming from behind.

When he turned, he saw a boy his age with bleached blonde hair and the most obnoxious smile on his face that was wiped away as soon as his eyes fell on him. Kiyoomi could slowly feel his heart thundering as he took in the bad hair job and wide eyes, gulping as he schooled his face into a frown.

“What are you doing here?”

…

Over the course of the next few weeks, both men began to find themselves hanging around more with one another. Since they didn’t have much to do other than mingling about, both found themselves sitting on the forecastle and watching the day pass before them, Kiyoomi often sitting on a picnic blanket several feet from Atsumu as the boy regaled his adventures. Somehow, Kiyoomi didn’t find him as obnoxious as how he first looked. Underneath the smirk and horrible laugh, Atsumu was just a boy trying to stake out for himself in the world.

“If I had the chance, I would like to go pro in volleyball but it wasn’t as though we had a good enough team back in school. Samu, oh, he’s my twin but he’s way uglier than me, managed to open an onigiri shop down in Hyogo! You should come by sometime,” Atsumu grinned as he munched away on a sandwich he had stolen from the kitchens. Kiyoomi nibbled at his own tuna sandwich, watching as Atsumu leaned back onto the metal flooring and smiled at the sun.

“How I wished I could have money! With that I will have all the freedom in the world!” He doesn’t take notice of Kiyoomi’s hands shaking as he balls his fist, his hand shaking as Kiyoomi whispers, “You’re wrong. You know nothing of that world.” The world of the rich was not kind; people were always out to get you, monitoring your every move. Each marriage is political, each handshake a symbol of new alliances. Kiyoomi would never be able to live a life of his own choosing.

As the weeks went on, Kiyoomi often tried to find ways to tell Atsumu that he was a man. He was pretty sure the guy was only hanging around with him because he looked like a pretty girl that would be good to flirt with. Kiyoomi, not wanting to hurt his feelings, often just played along as Atsumu hung out with him. Both of them rarely hung out on deck since people would be whispering things about why the child of the rich Sakusa family was even hanging around with a third-rate passenger. He wouldn’t have bothered about it but he was worried that Atsumu might be affected.

Days turned to weeks and soon, they were halfway through their journey to the land of freedom. Kiyoomi found himself yearning to step foot on dry land again but at the same time, he yearned to not let go of Atsumu. He felt he was the one and only person to give him the space he needed; he never once tried to go near Kiyoomi after he had flinched away from him.

“Hey, Kiyoko, meet me at the forecastle just before sunset. I want to show you something,” Atsumu says one day. Somehow he had managed to swing by to his suites in the first class floor, sneaking past as a waiter. He had smirked, putting a finger to his lips as he delivered breakfast to them, Kiyoomi too stunned to react as he promptly left the food in his hands and disappeared. Luckily he had been dressed as Kiyoko to head out when Atsumu appeared, Kiyoomi groaning as he tried to formulate his thoughts.

That evening, he found himself waiting on the deck of the ship. The wind was much colder now since they were headed up to the Artic, a shawl wrapped around the black dress he wore to keep himself warm. Kiyoomi prayed that the wind wouldn’t knock his wig off when he heard his name being called, Atsumu waving him over as he called out.

“Kiyoko! Come on to the crow’s nest!”

“Are you mad?! Do you want to get into trouble?”

“No worries! No worries!” Atsumu grins as he clambers up like a monkey, Kiyoomi doing his best not to rip his dress as he followed after. He could hear Atsumu’s mad laughter flying in the wind as he attempted to climb, the blonde offering him a hand to pull him up to the crow’s nest as he grins.

“Now, stand still.” He slowly takes Kiyoomi’s arms under his and spreads them out, letting his shawl fly behind him as he gently whispers into his ear.

“Now, look ahead.” Kiyoomi looks in front to gasp, taking in the beautiful sunset as polar ice caps floated around them. The sun touched the ice, making them glow in the setting sun as Atsumu wraps his arms around him, his head coming to rest onto Kiyoomi’s shoulder as he sings softly.

Every night in my dreams  
I see you, I feel you  
That is how I know you go on.

Far across the distance  
And spaces between us  
You have come to show you go on.

Near, far, wherever you are  
I believe that the heart does go on  
Once more, you open the door  
And you're here in my heart  
And my heart will go on and on

They continued to stay like that as the sun slowly dips over the horizon. Atsumu gently reaches out to turn Kiyoomi’s face, his breath ghosting his lips as he whispers, “Kiyoko, I…” Kiyoomi gently reaches out to press a finger to Atsumu’s lips, silencing him as he stops him from kissing.

No, he won’t let him steal his first kiss without him knowing who he was.

“Kiyoomi. My name is Kiyoomi.”

He gently tugs away the wig secured to his head, revealing his now growing black locks. He looks at the ground, hoping he didn’t have to see Atsumu’s disappointed face on the revelation of his gender when Atsumu merely chuckles.

“Man. Woman, so what? You’re beautiful, Omi. That is what matters.” He reaches out to pull Kiyoomi into a kiss, gentle and sweet as the sun set beyond the horizon. The last rays of the sun painted the two young lovers a brilliant orange and gold, illuminating them in the final daylight as the sun sank beyond the horizon.

That night, Atsumu watched as Kiyoomi slept beside him, counting the moles on his shoulder blades as he remembered kissing each and every one of them. He slowly draws the covers over Kiyoomi’s body, the other boy shivering as he holds him close, not wanting to let him go as he presses a kiss onto his temple.

“I love you, Kiyoomi.”

…

Captain Ushijima Wakatoshi has miscalculated.

The captain grips the board as he watches the large iceberg looming before his eyes, the officers trying to get the ship to steer away to no avail. Danger was upon them and soon, the Shiratorizawa, the world’s most unsinkable ship, may be doomed to go underwater forever.

How could he have made such a mistake?

“Captain Ushijima, what are we going to do?” Officer Tendou asks as Ushijima steels himself. All his men surrounded him, looking to him for advice as he takes a deep breath.

What kind of captain was he if he couldn’t even protect his own ship.

“Prepare the ship for evacuation.”

…

Kiyoomi awoke to the sound of sirens blaring above his head. he slowly peeled himself away from Atsumu’s sticky body, groaning at how he wanted to have a shower when he sees movement outside of the carriage they had found refuge in. Kiyoomi nearly combusts as he remembers what they had done the previous night when all of a sudden, there was a great roar as the ship collided with something. All around them, luggage were beginning to fall and screams being heard from outside, Atsumu finally rousing from his sleep as Kiyoomi snaps.

“Atsumu, we have to move.” They quickly yanked on their clothes, Kiyoomi grimacing about how yucky he felt before pulling on his wig for good measure. The two of them stepped out into the corridor to see people swarming to escape, luggage in hand as they fled in a panic. The two of them nearly get knocked back into the luggage room as people attempted to pass, all of them too panicked to even think about trampling over their fellow passengers to care. Atsumu grabs onto Kiyoomi’s shoulders, steadying him as they slowly moved into the crowd.

“Oi, where have you been all night?” Akagi, Atsumu’s roommate yells as they get pushed through. The throng of people barely moved as everyone attempted to climb topside, Kiyoomi already starting to feel panicked as air began to dwindle.

“I was busy! What the hell is going on?!”

“Are you mad?! We collided with a damn iceberg! The damn ship is sinking!” Akagi shouted as they finally made it topside to see that the place was in utter chaos. Families were being shoved apart as lifeboats were being pulled on deck. Crew members were trying to calm down the passengers as people screamed for their loved ones, people being pulled away from each other to be tossed onto lifeboats. Kiyoomi’s fingers curled around Atsumu’s when he spotted Wakatoshi in the distance, gently trying to help a child and woman onto a lifeboat as Kiyoomi called out to him.

“Wakatoshi! What’s going on?!” he yells as Wakatoshi turns to them. In all his life, Kiyoomi had never seen the man look so grave as he bows his head in shame. Kiyoomi knew it wasn’t the time to go asking him about how he managed to crash the ship, moving instead to see Atsumu grabbing onto his arm.

“Kiyoomi, get onto a boat right now.”

“Are you mad?! I’m a man and only women and children are allowed to get on board!” Kiyoomi snaps as Atsumu yells, “Now you’re Sakusa Kiyoko! You’re a woman so get on a damn boat!”

“I’m not about to get saved and leave you behind!” He slams a fist into Atsumu’s chest as he holds onto his shirt, sobbing into it as he tried not to let go.

“I don’t want to die. But I don’t want to lose you too,” he whispers as Atsumu gently reaches out to hold him. All around them, people were clambering to get on board, some nearly shoving them apart as they tried to save themselves. Already, boats were getting lowered down into the frigid waters, the screams all but increasing as the boat slowly began to sink lower and lower. Kiyoomi shivers as he holds onto Atsumu when someone shoves him from behind, shouting for him to get out of the way when a loud crack echoed across the deck.

“Oh shit,” Atsumu swears as the ground began to tilt beneath them. A loud roar filled the air as the ship began to crack in half, sending some lifeboats and people into the cold waters as Wakatoshi tried to call for order. Already some people were attempting to jump into lifeboats only to plunge into the freezing Artic waters below.

Kiyoomi slipped, nearly falling back as Atsumu grabs onto his hand, pulling him upwards as they began to run to what was the front deck. People were sliding as they were being cast into the water, their screams burning into Kiyoomi’s mind as they scrambled up, trying to hold onto something for support. Atsumu never let go as he kept calling out to Kiyoomi, making sure he was alright when Kiyoomi turns to see Wakatoshi helping the last person onto the lifeboat just before one of the pillars collapse. He barely had time to turn as he was slammed by it and into the cold water, Kiyoomi barely able to scream his name as he was crushed.

“Hey! Omi, now isn’t the time to mourn!” Atsumu yells as he grunts, all but hauling the two of them towards the top of the ship. Other people were not as fortunate, many of them falling to their deaths in the cold waters below as the two of them barely hung on. Atsumu pulled Kiyoomi up to the top of the ship, Kiyoomi shaking with fear and cold as he held onto him, trying to calm him down. Kiyoomi pressed his hands to his ears as he tried to block out the sound of water rushing around him, his eyes wide in fear as Atsumu slowly cradled him. The other boy didn’t let go until the ship finally fell apart, sending the two of them tumbling into the cold water.

At that moment, Kiyoomi thought he was truly going to die. He found himself going under as he felt his body freeze, his mind going blank as he tried to kick up. His skin stung as he began to freeze up, barely noticing the hand that carried him back up to the surface and onto a floating piece of metal from the ship. Kiyoomi gasps as he breaks the surface, coughing water as Atsumu let out a weak grin.

“Looks like ya made it.” Kiyoomi realises that Atsumu was still in the water, the black haired boy trying to move to pull him on top as he almost fell back into the water. His dress clung to his skin as he sobs, trying to pull Atsumu on board as the blonde whispers, “It can only hold one.”

“You moron. You stupid moron! You could have saved yourself! Why me?! You have a brother to go back to!” Kiyoomi sobs as Atsumu chuckles weakly. Small puffs of air escaped from his lips as he reaches out to touch Kiyoomi’s face, his fingers cold as ice cubes as he whispers, “Tell Samu… that I am sorry.” His hand nearly slides back into the water, Kiyoomi capturing them before they could fall as he brings it to his mouth, pressing a kiss to each and every one of his fingers as he sobs.

“Tsumu. Don’t go… please… don’t go…” he slowly whispers as Atsumu weakly gasps, his body slowly freezing as he whispers.

“You never did tell me you loved me.”

“I love you. I love you. I love you, Miya Atsumu. I love you. I love you. I…” Kiyoomi hiccups when he realises Atsumu was no longer alive, his eyes glazed over as he slowly sinks into the water. Kiyoomi tried to grab onto him, sobbing as he finally released his one and only love into the depths of the Artic ocean.

The next time he awakens, Atsumu was gone and he was onboard a ship, blankets thrown over him as he tried to sit up. His body screamed in pain as he slowly flopped back down onto his back when the sound of someone running towards him sounded, his head turning to see his mother sobbing before reaching to hug him. They didn’t exchange any words, Kiyoomi already guessing what had happened to his father as he held onto his mother tightly and prayed that they would be able to find their way home once more.

Many months later, Kiyoomi finds himself back in Japan, standing before the grave of the Miya family in Hyogo.

When he had finally arrived in Japan, the first thing he had done was to seek out Miya Osamu. When he arrived at the quint onigiri restaurant, it took everything in his power to not walk away from it and never tell the younger twin that Atsumu was gone.

When he finally stepped into the shop, he nearly broke down when he saw how uncanny the Miya twins looked. Osamu had been shocked to see a customer breaking down in his shop like that, moving to sit him down as Kiyoomi tried to explain himself. After a good hour of crying and holding onto him, Kiyoomi finally broke the news to Osamu, to which Osamu had cried and held onto him for support. He felt so much like his brother but Kiyoomi knew that no one could ever replace Atsumu, no matter how much they looked like him.

“Thank you, for being with him in his last moments,” Osamu had whispered before telling him he was part of the family now and was always welcomed back in Onigiri Miya and Hyogo whenever he wanted to stop by.

Now, standing in front of Atsumu’s grave, Kiyoomi could only utter the words that Atsumu had sung to him, tears falling from his eyes as he remembered of a certain sunset he shared with the faux blonde before the world ended around them.

_You're here, there's nothing I fear and I know that my heart will go on. We'll stay forever this way. You are safe in my heart and my heart will go on and on._

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry for what happened to Atsumu people! Now I'm going to go to bed for real.
> 
> Come yell at me on Tumblr or Twitter @runningfromrealitytoanime.
> 
> All comments and kudos are welcomed! They really make my day!


End file.
